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The Hug That Said It All

I witnessed a hug the other day.

Big deal, right? People see other people hug all the time.

Yeah, but this was a hug that melted my heart.

We attended a graduation party in honor of our nephew. It was held under a pavilion. There was quite a spread of food, and each table was loaded with decorations and favors (very nicely done, Ange!). Obviously a lot of work . . . a lot of love was poured into this party.

As the evening wound down, many of us hung around to help clean up. That's the un-fun part of a party. The un-fun part of this party became even more un-fun when, in an attempt to dump a drum of trash into a plastic trash bag, wet, gooey, smelley garbage ended up on the concrete floor of the pavilion. It was rank and disgusting, but my sister-in-law (the afore mentioned "Ange.") cleaned up without complaint.

When the graduate meandered by shortly thereafter, I jokingly told him, in a scolding voice, that he had better get down on his knees in gratitude for all his mother had done for him that day (I sure hope he knew I was joking!). He looked at me blankly then turned to his mom. Before she could even explain what had happened, he had her wrapped in his embrace. Being at least a head taller than her, his embrace included resting his chin on top of her head.

I've know this mother and her son since before the son was born. We've been together over many a holiday and various festive occasions that included plenty of just-hanging-out time, but this one moment in time, this one gesture told me more about their relationship than all the hundreds of hours we've spent together over the past eighteen years put together. This single embrace, given without the slightest hesitation, said it all.

I don't know that all mothers and their sons have this kind of love. I just happened to recognize it because it's what I have with my son.

We mothers of sons have to give our boys away to another woman at some point. It's a bitter-sweet offering. The pain of giving to someone else what you've held dear for so long, what has been solely yours for so many years, what you have nurtured and treasured is mixed with the joy of knowing that your son will love his wife well and that he will be an exceptional husband.

I want to warn you, Ange, of the pain and the joy of giving your son away. When the time comes, know that you've done your part and that you've done it well.

Comments

  1. ...and when you see your sons love on their sons and daughters like you loved on them, your heart will swell again with pride and joy. Because you know that now they, too, have come to be a part of our "club".

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  2. This brought tears to my eyes. I thought of not just my sons, but of THE son, and depending on whether you think God is male or female, or both (and of course, there's Mary), of the mixed emotions he/she felt giving us that very special son. I guess this spoke to me on more levels that you probably intentioned! It was wonderful meeting you this weekend and I hope that our paths cross again soon. Reading your blog, I now know why you don't look your age -- your spirituality keeps you young. (Plus those good genes and such!)

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