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The All-or-Nothings and The Balanced

Perhaps you've heard of the young adult novels by Scott Westerfeld, The Pretties and The Uglies (I could go on to tell you what they're about, but I think that might be obvious), and perhaps you've heard the terms, "the haves" and "the have-nots?" While these refer to appearance and financial position respectively, I have some terms for two basic personality types: "the all-or-nothings" and "the balanced."

I belong to the latter group (sometimes I think I'm the poster child for it: I'm so balanced, I could send my personality to walk a tight rope over the Royal Gorge - note, my personality, not me!), but I have an extensive list of close relationships to people in the former group: my husband, my son, two of my sisters, and my boss to name a few. Without exception, their hearts are huge. They're passionate and relational. At work, they're the ones who have vision. They look towards the future, towards improvement, growth, expansion. They don't settle for the status quo. In relationships, they're excited to see you, talk to you. They love people and being with people and helping people. They pour themselves out and into whatever and whoever they are with at any given moment. For the most part, they're high-energy.

I've known for a very long time that I need these people in my life. They inspire me, encourage me, urge me on even when they don't say a word, but here's my lightning bolt moment for the day - what if they need me too? Not just what I can do for them (I'm the practical, responsible one), but what if my balanced personality in and of itself helps to ground them? What if I bring something to them that they need just as they bring to my life what I need?

Could it be possible that God would put me in relationships with all-or-nothings not just because I need them but because they need me too? Could it be that we need each other? Maybe that we even rub off on each other a little bit? Could it be that it's okay to be who God made us to be whether we're an all-or-nothing or a balanced?

I get excited just thinking about it! Maybe, just maybe God made us who we are on purpose; and maybe, just maybe, He made our friends, our family, and our co-workers who they are on purpose too; and maybe, just maybe, He put us together to learn from each other but not to become each other.

Comments

  1. Yep, you too are fearfully and wonderfully made! It is good to know. I call this being delighted in who God has made me to be. I laughed at your definitions, I use rule-keepers and rebels. I find that I am a rebel, but have all these rule-keepers in my life who are great people. I used to just let them cause me to feel bad about myself, then I learned they couldn't help themselves, and that I was valuable too. Now I need to have balance in appreciating both.

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  2. I LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE!!!! When I grow up, I hope some of you will be found in me too!

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